Jan 21, 2009

Excerpts of the interview with the outgoing president by Larry king

Larry King: We have with us tonight the outgoing erstwhile president of the United States.  So Mr. Bush; how was your term in office?

George Bush: It was nice yes, although the United States of America couldn't’t catch Osama; they seem to have caught Obama!

LK: How do you think his tenure in office is going to be?

GB: Colored...err..aah...i mean colorful!! He has got quite an uphill task!

LK: Why do you say that Mr. Bush; is it because of all the Bush-fires that you have set off all over the world?

GB: In that case the Australian PM would be better equipped with Foster's at his side! On a more serious note i think the legacy I have started shall be carried forward by a man with "Barack" in his name.

LK: What is this legacy that you are referring to? I hope it does not involve a white house intern!

GB: I'm offended Larry! The erstwhile president 'screwed' up only once. I did it consistently!

LK: Does screwing up with reference to the Iraq war or the Afghan war or Abu Gharib or your statements in/about all these places?

GB: None! I have achieved what no one can - i can read kindergarten books upside down! I also specialize in dodging  projectiles hurled by saudi’s.

LK: Coming back to the lewinsky...err...i mean legacy - what exactly were you referring to?

GB: I have destabilized the entire planet...my objective here is almost complete...

LK: OOOOk... sir, what do you think is the biggest challenge that Barack Husein Obama has in front of him?

GB: I think the biggest challenge is to stop the Tamil forces to take over the tiger' camps.

LK: (blankly) Sir, Are you talking about Sri Lanka?

GB: Yes! I'm glad that you look stumped for once. See, it was like this - I was looking to park some of our jets and carriers near India - poor sods have just one carrier - i thought they'd feel better, and saw this largish island right next to India on the map and thought... why not! Later Condi told me it was already occupied! So i was waiting for their squabbling to get over.

LK: So you mean, Sri Lanka holds the key to establishing stability in the South Asian region??

GB: Absolutely! You don’t want to piss off the Chinese by going on that side! Doesn't seem so but they see everything! Besides - i get my toilet paper from there!

LK: So you set up a base in Sri Lanka and then what?

GB: We can deploy freights to China on the east and Pakistan on the west...

LK: Hmmm...Sounds plausible - What am I saying!!!

GB: ...and then we can send spies into all these countries via the sea route - like in India...

LK: OK! We are back into cuckoo land!

LK: I’m sorry Mr. Bush but we have to end this interview here.

LK: Right! So this episode of America’s biggest loser’s continues with our next guest – Britney Spears…

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