Conversations with myself...

A stillness has come to the air around me. I really cannot describe it, it makes me feel different. It makes me feel peaceful yet wasted. Probably there are two thought processes colliding with each other and culminating into this dilemma. My quandary lies in the question that: Is this a dilemma at all? or is it just the logical progression of ones life?

My good friend says in a lighter vein that I'm just PMSing. Funny character!

But yes, the symptoms shown by cranky women are not unlike mine. Except for the obvious...

These mood swings are highly disturbing in nature. I call them mood swings because of a lack of a better alternative. They leave a person feeling like Crusoe  - without his man Friday. Stranded and nowhere near civilization. Had been discussing this issue with my roomie about half an hour back. We were reminiscing about good old college days and the placement week. There were people that had become so desperate that they were trying their luck with each and every company - like a slot machine; there were yet others that did not flinch at the highest packages that were being doled out and were adamant of the profile that they were looking for. These two extremes are not the only ones existing. there were others like me that exercised discretion or were too confused to understand what to do. My Dilemma rises here again. 

Was this prudent?

Or was waiting prudent?

Thankfully it was clear that going and slot machining was stupid.

I have reason to believe that time may have the answers to the questions posed below with relation to my little discussion.

 - Do these people have more clarity towards life? Should i aspire to be like these people? 

 - Or should i stick to my own confusion and call it discretion?

 - Or am i just thinking too much here?

The last point is the English equivalent of "jaanede na yaar!!!"

.I shall come back to this comment saying that a human is different from animals because they have been gifted with the ability to think about things

.Yes, that is true, but humans have a limit to their comprehension and things beyond comprehension should be left God.

.Why should i not be considered qualified enough to understand the issue at hand? After all, I am the subject under discussion. And taking the shield of God is a very convenient way to explain away our lack of understanding of phenomenon

.Do you have control?

.I have control over myself.

.Can you control the happenings in your life?

.I can only influence them, external factors are out of my control.

.Then you should just leave them to the divine.

.But other factors are controlled by various other individuals that have control over their own little real estate and in turn influence other people's lives. Where does God figure in this?

.Ever heard of fate?

.Yes, i have. Going through life thinking there is something out there and which is reserved for you and that eventually you'll get it because God has thought so... well doesn't go down too well, isn't it? isn't that a a very defeatist way of thinking?

.No, it isn't.

.Why?

.Because, very simply, fate is decided for you. A very illogical turn of events that may look totally out of context and uncalled for may change the course of your life without any intervention by third party. And it finally turns out - they may be good for you. So these phenomenon in short form is called fate. And God is the scriptwriter.

.Why do all this?

.Now even i cant answer that. That's why the phrase "God Knows!" was invented. 

Leave this kind of thinking for the Almighty. 

And...

"Jaane De Na Yaar!!!"